OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
He just asked me if I'd be interested in couples therapy. Fuck my life.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
He seemed genuinely disappointed when I told him I wasn't going to make out with him to Bring Me To Life by Evanescence so I feel like I've pinpointed the breaking point of this relationship
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
i just woke up from a 4 hour nap, still drunk, to make mac n cheese.
Randomize
