honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
The best part about drinking boxed wine is you can blow up the bag and use it as a pillow
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
Woke up backwards on a recliner
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
Randomize
