cab driver gave us mini bottles of jd for the ride home & proceeded to run every red light. wonder how many bottles he drank.
I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
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