Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
So while she was giving me a lap dance I told her I quit med school. Just so she didn't feel like the only one who's made bad decisions in their life.
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
Her text was so long it had an arrow to expand it. You know it's bad when even your iPhone can't handle her
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
Randomize
