I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
I'm going on a valentine's date with the random guy i hooked up with in the bar bathroom this weekend...i feel like julia roberts
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
He wants to pour butter pecan flavored coffee creamer on me and lick it off. I'm like, dude, gross. French Vanilla ok? Ugh.
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize
