you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
We found your brother, passed out, floating in our pool, with a bottle, on a blow up mattress. How did he mange to walk 2 blocks and get into our backyard?
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
Either I need to stop bringing you back to my apt or I need to stop buying ikea furniture
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
You were so proud of your stupid "magic trick" but all you did was piss on the couch. don't talk to me for a few days.
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
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