I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
You proceeded to call me a hoe and then informed me that Bear Grylls is and always will be more important than I am to you.
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
Every time I drink before 5 somebody's pet dies
Stop drinking before 5
Easier said than done
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
Just wanted to let you know it's 3am and, at this point, I believe your sister has more of my semen in her than I do. So suck on that, fuckface.
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
