Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
The cup holder in my recliner holds a whole bottle of wine. That's definitely a sign.
It's a sad day when ur phone automatically updates u on Thursdays that traffic is normal and how long it will take to get to the bar
That's fucking great actually
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
You know that panicky moment when you go home with a guy and realize you’ve been there before?!? HAPPENING RIGHT NOW!!!
Turns out I banged his son a few months ago but the kids back at college so I don’t have to worry about him walking in while Dad has me bent over the couch
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