he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
I consider it a successful poop when you only have to wipe once.
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
Randomize
