If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
Celebrated Veteran's Day by getting a Marine (who just got back from deployment in the middle east) drunk and laid for the first time in 6 months. #Murica
Randomize
