Farmville is her only friend.
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
He said he was trying to live vicariously through me. I didn't have the heart to tell him that meant he was vicariously fucking his best friend.
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
Randomize
