I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
It's basically the same plan, only step one gets revised to "look hot enough that he forgets I fucked his roommate"
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
You are lucky that I'm drunk. Otherwise I would bone you into another universe
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
Randomize
