I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
Randomize
