I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
You know you're a whore when you color code your calendar with who you slept with on what day incase you have ANOTHER pregnancy scare
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
I would fuck him just for his dog
i woke up this morning from the best one night stand. i made the guy mickey mouse pancakes for breakfast and when i walked back into the bedroom he said "marry me"
Randomize