Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
I standby a snuggie being perfectly acceptable attire for drunkenly walking your dog at 5am. Our new neighbors did not seem to agree.
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
Randomize
