East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
I thought I was riding a bike, but I guess it was a vacuum cleaner
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
soo... how was my night?
ATTENTION: just found out of have strep. if we have had sex in the past week, might wanna go to the doctor. if you plan to have sex with me in the next 20 days go buy some condoms. stupid antibiotics.
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
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