me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
I IMAGINED YOU YELLING SURPRISE WITH JAZZ HANDS. AND I LOVE YOU FOREVER
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
Sex on the scooter in the parking lot wasn't the smartest idea. Actual quote from the cop as he handed me the ticket and fist bumped me.
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
Dick very happy bro
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
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