I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
Randomize
