Do you have any idea why the dryer isn't working?
Because you touch yourself at night.
Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
Her directions to the house party: "the north star will guide you, turn left. I'm wearing the potato hat"
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
I touched a dick in church today
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
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