Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
the bouncer made me realize that puking in line does not get you in any faster
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
Hey remember that night when you sang Fergie to me? I think that's the exact moment in time when the thought "I could be faithful to this man" came into serious consideration.
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
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