at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
She gave me a handjob while eating a mcdouble with mayo on the way home from the bars at 2 in the morning. Car was full of people. This could be forever
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
why the fuck is there hamburger meat in the toaster. i repeat: WHY THE FUCK IS THERE HAMBURGER MEAT IN MY NEW TOASTER
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
Correction: Jimmy johns. The one pita pit employee has been an asshole to me ever since you locked them out of the store
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
Randomize
