JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
Randomize