You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
I also love my swipe to text changed a singular vagina to a plural vaginas. like my phone somehow knows I secretly want 2 vaginas
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
Randomize
