VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
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