Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
I cooked you Mac and cheese when I was drunk and drugged. That counts for about 4 meals. Try harder
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
I was just lying down, dumping goldfish into my mouth and they like all came out I thought I was going to choke and die and people would be like damn that's so sad, she died laying in bed stuffing her face and reading kanye wests twitter, damn.
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
