I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
Three questions. How does a tomato drive a car, how does an asparagus play a guitar, and how am I still so high that I chose to watch Veggie Tales?
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
He asked the waiter, at 6:40 am, drunk, if they served alcohol. After he said no, he's like 'well, I guess we can eat then.'
Yeah I passed out. The last thing I remember is the lady telling me I couldn't play the clarinet with my nose.
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
