I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
I woke up naked this morning and I found out that I thought I was Adam last night and Eve was my wife so I ran naked saying I was in the Garden of Eden and I could shit wherever I wanted.....too bad the garden was in my friends apt.......I spent the morning cleaning and have reached a new low
Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
a kid puked on the floor and instead of, you know, cleaning it they cut a square out of the carpet with a boxcutter and threw it outside
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
