I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
I went to work hungover and threw up in the break room. Told them I was pregnant and then said I quit. I don't have a job now, thanks vodka.
Randomize