Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
It doesn't matter if I tell the story beginning to end or end to beginning, the story still starts with a random girl blowing me in the bathroom.
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
Dude, I'm telling you, date younger. He brought pizza, made me squirt twice, and then left to immediately go to brunch with his mom.
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
Randomize
