you're like a bully in the Christmas story
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
So my parents just watched me pour their rum into a bottle and only add crystal light powder, no water... Talk about being judged. All I could say was "Cortland tricks?"
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
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