none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
Thing I actually said tonight: "I want to achieve Ultimate level drunkenness, I'm only at Champion"
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
Randomize
