dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
Pretty sure I asked the person at the pharmacy counter in Walgreens to marry me last night. But also remember Rachel Maddow crawling through the TV screen, so my memory might be a bit compromised...
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
I gave him a BJ and he left. Coincidentally that's the name of my memoir.
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
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