I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
Sign she's a keeper: "I would rather be late to brunch than waste a perfectly good boner."
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
He brought me Plan B in the snowstorm.
A+ 👏🏼
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
You were drinking tequila through a straw.. and kept waving your arms at me and getting this intense stare down as you muttered something about jedi mind tricks.
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
Randomize
