i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
Where is the hickey?
Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
Only good thing about the 50 Shades is that it is now completely OK to call a credit card co to dispute the charge for nipple clamps that didnt arrive.
Randomize
