I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
The only thing I've had to eat today was the half eaten sausage biscuit I found on my chest when I woke up this morning.
Breakfast is bomb, yo. McDonald's before ten thirty is like Katie Holmes before Tom Cruise.
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
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