apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
I have already decided that it happened in an alternate universe since both of the people involved don't remember it and we only have the word of a sober person that it happened at all
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
Randomize