K I think ***** turned off her phone. Guess I can't make her feel any more miserable tonight so I'm goin to sleep
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
We found you passed out clutching your purse. There was 16oz of unopened cheddar cheese inside. You just kept saying SALSA YES.
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
I held the blackjack dealer's hand and told the old asian woman she was 'soft to the touch, but cold as ice"
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
Randomize
