Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
it's great music for shaving your balls
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
His dick is hereby named Charles Dickens. Will's is less cerebral. I'd like to call it Pinnacle like the vodka we drank when we hooked up, but I feel like that's a compliment it doesn't deserve.
Breaking into his house to steal the sheets I'd drunk pissed on before he got home was not how I wanted to be spending spring break
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
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