Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
He wouldn't let me leave his house until he made me orgasm once for every year I've been alive. The birthday sex song did not prepare me for this.
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
This toilet bowl is my home.
If I didn't have booty calls, my apartment would never get clean
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