i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
Say "Steve Buscemi is hot." with a straight face.
Her tattoo has the intellectual profundity of snakes on a plane except you can't laugh.
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
How am I so hungover that wearing sunglasses hurts my head?
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
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