Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
I got the shit slapped outta me last night but the pain in my jaw doesn’t even compare to the hangover I have.
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