Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
Been in the ER for 3 hours now. This hospitals transition to paperless is not going well. But my doctor looks like Elton John and just gave me percocet
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
Randomize