Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
What does it say about my expectations if I'm pounding three beers the hour before a date?
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
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