Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
THEN YOU WILL NOT GET TO SEE MY TITS TONIGHT OR IN THE NEAR FUTURE YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
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