Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
i think my mom watched the whole time
Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
Also we decided you're the person whose going to die at my bachelor party...do the math you're the most logical choice
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
just found a bag of Oreos in my purse labeled "emergency".
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
Randomize
