I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
i will replace your cream cheese. there's enough for breakfast. you are my friend. i had guests we wanted bagels so bad im sorry. i left you notes. i love you. you have enough for a bagel or two and i will get you more. you are so pretty.
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize
