My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
so im decorating easter eggs with my family and my mom is writing "Jesus is risen" and "God loves you!" on the eggs. i wrote things like "I'm naked!" and "there are drugs in these eggs!" on mine.
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
Randomize
