she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
I gave him a BJ and he left. Coincidentally that's the name of my memoir.
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
Woke up with a padlock locked onto my ear gauge and the first of many sticky note clues on my chest leading to the key.
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
Randomize
