i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
Great litmus test for what a useless adult you are: amount of shame you feel while eating a coffee cup of Fruity Pebbles
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
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