I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
I thought you were single?
I am. But thats cuz no one wants to marry shame and regret doused in tequila. But thanks for reminding me ya dick.
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
Randomize
