she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
It takes a special kind of Adderall to make me go to the hardware store, buy paint, and paint tiny polka-dots on all four of my bedroom walls.
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
Randomize
