question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
I'm at the bar and they've turned up lady gaga to cover the sound of the fire alarm.
I knew the only reason I bought a smartphone was to play "You're Havin My Baby" on the way to cvs to buy Plan B.
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
Pretty sure I just pissed straight whiskey...
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
Randomize
